Psychotic
by I Am The Pumpkin King
Summary: "You will come and work from 6-7 in the morning and come back to work from 7:30 to 11PM on weekday's we will figure out your weekend hours later today." Naruto just stared at the man "DA'fuk THE HELL I AM!" Come enjoy Naruto's life at the hands Onholdinde
1. I never liked you anyways

Disclamer I do not own Naruto if I did it would not be a children's show...it would be yaoi...

Have mercy! First fic

Leave comments idk what just leave comments.

No beta this is all me just point it out i shall fix!

Um please enjoy

This is a SasukeX Naruto

And this may be the most epic of all epic fanfics if you like my writing.

Um partial inspiration goes to Totally Captivated.

And the rest is my idea of a good time lol enjoy and you may now begin to read

Psychotic

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The sky was crying…yes the sky has feelings, well at least to a 7 year old Naruto Uzumaki it does. Good thing he brought his umbrella with little yellow rubber duckies on it! (**A/N** so cute .)

Naruto, to anyone at first sight is an adorable little boy. With his golden blond hair, deep cerulean eyes, sun kissed skin, and white teeth; he captivates people and fills them with emotions that sometimes…they rather not have. Emotions such as jealousy and spite those are the dominate ones. Thus people were very mean to the adorable boy. However this did not put a damper on his spirits. Oh to the contraire! This just made the little blond feistier! And even more of an enigma to those around him, and at times a desire.

Anyways back to the adorable blond with the rubber ducky umbrella.

Naruto found himself outside on his way back from school, on the last stretch homeward bound, so close to home and out of the rain, standing in front of a drenched little boy. Naruto frowned at this.

'_Why would anyone be out while the sky is crying?' _was all the little boy could think.

Thus Naruto shifted his umbrella to shield the other little boy from the rain. At first the boy didn't move, didn't make a sound, didn't do anything to acknowledge that the blond had done him a courtesy. So Naruto, never the patient one, spoke first.

"Hey are you ok?" the sweet little blond asked in his sweet little voice.

Then and only then did the drenched boy move. The boy jerked then lifted his eyes to meet Naruto's, and when they met Naruto gasped. He gasped because of what he saw. What he saw shocked him. What he saw hurt him. Hurt him in such a way that he couldn't help but smile at the boy. What he saw was a similarity. What he saw in the small boy's eyes was sorrow. No, anguish. Anguish is what seemed to flow in the boys eyes. Those dark, dark, oh so very dark eyes that looked like abysses that would swallow him whole.

"And if I said I wasn't…what would you do?" the reply was rude and the boy scowled and looked mean even from his spot on the floor. He looked all…superior…well that's the word I'm using I don't think 7 year old Naruto knows that word…maybe the wet boy on the floor did…I digress. Naruto couldn't help but wonder how could someone there age look like the adults did? Especially all soak'n wet and what not. But this didn't put the blond off at all he just beamed at the boy and said…

"I would do whatever I can to make you feel better." Now the dark eyed boy was not expecting this answer, no he was expecting to get meanness back.

"Hn" the little boy then proceeded to stand up with little effort. Naruto couldn't help but think he would have slipped first, and then stood up, but he wouldn't voice this. Oh no he wouldn't. Naruto just continued to hold the umbrella over the boy and smile.

Naruto and his deep cerulean eyes took in the dark eyed boy's features for the first time. The boy was pale. Like…like…like…um…a paper perhaps? No that shiny stuff the table is made out of! No! Like a ghost! No, the shiny stuff the table is made out of.

"Is that a word? That noise you just made?" The boy had inky black hair that laid about his head like a mop that gets plopped on the floor.

"No, dobe it's a sound." The boy's voice was high but lower than Naruto's so he frowned at that.

"Hey! Don't call me names!" Naruto's voice to the boy was sweet and melodious. "Bastard…"

"That's a bad word you shouldn't say that." The boy was taller than Naruto by about an inch.

"Well what you called me is probably a bad word and you shouldn't have said it either!" They both sized each other up and unbeknownst to the other liked what they saw.

"Hn. You talk a lot." The dark haired boy began to reach out for the blond. The blond just continued to smile and stayed still.

"I get told that a lot. You're pretty. Why are you out here by yourself?" For the first time since this conversation started Naruto dropped his smile.

"I'm not surprised. You're cute. C-can I…hug you…" The soaked boy's voice trailed off at the end but the hand that was reached out never dropped. It just continued on its path to the other boy.

The blond scrunched his face. The other boy had completely ignored his question and he knew it. While the blond scrunched his face the other boy almost dropped his hand. Naruto reached out with one hand, the other still clasping the umbrella, and yanked the dark boy into his arms. He rested the arm holding the umbrella on the boys shoulder and clasped him tightly to his body. All the while the umbrella continued to shield them and the sky continued to cry.

"Thanks to you I'm all wet now…but that's ok…wanna come to my house?" this is what the blond whispered into the ear of a crying boy that was just so pretty.

"Dobe. Yes…I do." The boy whispered brokenly.

"Bastared" the boy whispered back.

They stood like that until the dark boy stopped crying.

"What's your name?" It had occurred to the blond that they never did exchange names.

"Hn. What's your name?" the blond huffed but playfully.

"I asked you first bastard!" The dark haired boy just grinned and grabbed the blond's tiny hand in his own.

"Sasuke." The blond smiled and it was contagious.

"I'm Naruto! You're my new best friend! Let's go! Jiraiya will love you!" The dark haired boy smiled so charmingly all through the walk just listening and teasing the little blond.

This would be Sasuke and Naruto's greatest and fondest memory…if they had remembered it.

. O.o . O.o

**12 Years later Naruto's Pov**

"Fuck off Kiba! Shit man! Gawd sometimes I can't stand your dog lovin' ass!" Who the fuck unleashes their fucking horse for a dog on their unsuspecting best friend huh! Who I ask you! Oh? What's this? Oh that's right! Only a horse dog loving imbecile that's who! And at 6:00 in the morning at that! On a Sunday!

"Hey man Akamaru loves your stupid ass IDK why he just does."

'_Kiba has the audacity to shrug at me! Oh he can eat my pillow!'_

So I throw my pillow that has drool on it…yes my drool is on it…at his face!

"That's just nasty man!" I heard the plop it made on his face so I concur.

"Oh shove it dog breath! Akamaru! No! Don't you do it! Aawww come on! Have mercy!" I tried to doge it really I did but when Akamaru wants to give you some wet, slobbery, nasty, slick, gross, cute..ish, dog kisses there is no getting out of it.

"Kiba, why is it you feel the need to ruin my mornings and make them so damn animated? It's too early for this man." I can't help but groan. Will I ever get a normal morning?

My best friend since after my car accident when I was like 9, which is also when my memory starts cuz that car crash did some mad damage, has been none other than Kiba Inuzuka. When we first met he said I was his princess and that he was my prince, and the prince looks after the princess. He has been stuck to me like glue ever since…*sigh* and I him. What can I say were best friends forever. No homo.

He and I have this thing where we really don't give a crap what our hair looks like cuz we be sexy as all hell and we know it. So he's a shaggy brunet and I'm a shaggy blond. It's not like we don't brush it or anything it's just hard to tame.

His family is like this clan thingy so they all have these weird/bad ass tattoos on their faces. His are these blood red triangles. He's, sadly, taller, bulkier, and I take that back not sadly. He's also dumber than me. Not that I'm dumb or anything.

He's darker than me skin tone wise, mentally I think we both are strong with the dark side. I have sexy naturally tan skin. It looks good on him though. No homo. We are bi if that counts just not bi for one another.

We both played football together him defense and I offence throughout high school. Texas state champions I am proud to say. Now we play for a college team. Now that I just went over all of that you're probably wondering just like I am, what is this hulking idiot doing in my room? My room that I share with no roommates, my room that should only have one key that is on me and one spare key that disappeared when I got the place a week later. Oh I think some light bulbs are going off! Oh you guessed it! Ding Ding Ding!

This ass wipe took my key and just comes and goes as he pleases.

"You know you love it just as much as you love me!" He crawls on the bed to kill me with his weight I think.

"Ugh you fat ass! And if I compare his kisses to how much I love you then I honestly don't love you then!"

This is the part where I get suffocated by my drool soaked pillow and beg for mercy or at least to go pee…

"You are not a morning person dude." I slap Kiba upside his head.

"It has taken the 10 years that you have known me to figure this out dummy?" I grin as he throws me in a head lock and Akamaru jumps on my back.

"Double teaming me huh! You guys always play dirty man!" After all that good fun is over…I seriously still do have to go pee.

-10 min later-

"Dude, what are we gonna do today?" Kiba had his head on my stomach and I somehow managed to get dressed and lay on top of my bed. Akamaru was chilling out on the floor.

"Well dip shit I was going to still be asleep right now, but who did that get ruined by? Hhmmm I fucking wonder?" I popped him lightly on the forehead and throw my other arm over my closed eyes thinking '_what the hell _are_ we gonna do today?'_

Kiba had just opened his mouth when my phone went off.

_**I called her on the phone and she touched herself.**_

_**She touched herself. She touched herself. **_

_**I called her on the phone and she touched herself.**_

_**I laughed myself to sleep.**_

"LOL dude who is that? Isn't that the ringer for all the hoes in yo phone, and the people you're too lazy to program in?" Kiba starts to poke me in the face and is getting dangerously close to my eye.

"Yeah, so"

"Ugh, so answer the damn phone!" I still don't move.

"What happened to bros before hoes? I really don't feel like answering IIIiiitttTTTT! Fuck man don't do that! Poking me in my side is not cool!" I am now on the floor with that stupid idiot I call a besty on my bed laughing at me.

"Answer it! Or I'll do something worst you spaz. Pfft I mean really who falls of the bed from a poke in the side? Our fearless (1)QB that's who." Ugh

"Hello?"

"_Naruto, baby I know we can work this out, I…"_

"Who is this." You have to cut them off or they don't get the point.

"_Baby! You can't be serious? It's Haku!"_

"Ugh, aren't you the one who broke up with me _baby_? What do you want."

"_Fine! If that's the way you want it, I tried to give you a second chance! You will regret this Uzumaki Naru-"_

"What a bitch. Are you happy now man I just got nagged at what 6:30 in the morning? Dah fuck is he doing awake at this time anyways?" Kiba just keeps laughing at my expense.

"Gawd you're the worst prince ever." I stand up to leave the room only to be wrenched back into a set of thick arms that wrap around me and yank me into a hard chest. I grin. But Kiba doesn't have to see it.

"Aaww I'm sorry princess. You know I care about you the most!" he nuzzles my neck and I swear he's really smearing his snot on me.

"Oh shut up and let's go to the mall and loiter around or something. And before you can even ask dog breath yes, that means we need to take Akamaru back home he is not staying in my room." Kiba is mumbling but I just laugh and try to pry his arms off my waist.

He doesn't let go so I bump my butt into his crotch so he stumbles back.

"Whoah, Naruto! Watch where you're swinging that weapon of mass destruction!"

"Shut up butt munch and let's go!"

"Autobots! Roll out!"

"You're such a dork!"

-2 hours later-

"Did you see that? Man tell me you saw that!" Kiba and I have been at the mall for about an hour and then we fell asleep in those massage chair things until this mall cop comes over and wakes us up, and then the craziest thing happened the cop got decked in the face!

"WTF dude yes I saw that! Why are we still sitting here dip shit! Get up before back up comes and we get stuck in this mess!"

Bros before hoes but I am not starting a criminal record with him for delayed reflexes.

Something seemed to click in his mind and he sprung up to jog up to me. You don't run. Ever. Never ever ever in a mall do you run. Too suspicious.

I look back to see the cop still getting decked in the face and feel kinda bad.

"Kiba, should we help him out?"

"Nope, it's going to be bad for us if we do. Don't play hero princess if you do your prince will not hesitate to restrain you in the opposite direction. You feel me?"

I roll my eyes.

When I turned to face forward I smacked into something. Hard.

"Oh fuck! I am so sorry." Kiba stabilizes me but he's tense. Now that's got me worried. To get a big guy like Kiba to tense is some pretty intense stuff. So I do what any normal person would do and look up.

"Wow…Um scary much." I silently reach back and fumble for Kiba's hand. It probably looks weak I know but fuck weak when your supper nervous and your best buddy is standing right next to you. Gay or not I am taking Kiba's hand and bolting. If I get the chance.

Before me stands a tall pale businessy looking dude. No scratch that mafia lookin' dude with a crew of mafia looking lackeys behind him. I don't look at his eyes but I do know there black. Or a deep, deep, deep like I mean they look black, brown. He's frowning. Why am I not surprised and I'm really not trying to take in any details about this dude so I'm just gonna go on ahead and walk around the scary looking group of mafia children.

Sharp eyes catch the movement of my hand searching for Kiba's and a voice that I was not expecting to hear comes up.

"So you finally went homo for your best friend huh?" Is that a bitch I hear? Oh dear. It's Haku.

"Come on Kiba we out. Nice seeing you too Haku." I try to walk around but Haku gets in our way. And Kiba's retarded feet don't seem to remember how to function.

"Oh, but Naruto you just have to meet my new boyfriend."

"I don't have to meet anybody. Now I would appreciate if you would be so kind as to move your scrawny little ass please." This earns me a shove from a not so large child who looks like he got in a fight with the bleach bottle.

"Whoah buddy! Hands off we don't want any trouble just trying to get to a different part of the mall. Don't go trying to figure out who you're gonna sell my vital organs to already." Oh Kiba I love you but are you trying to get us killed. The bleached guy sneers in response.

"You just disrespected bosses property. You're not getting off that easy."

"Hey fuck off man. Go get this gold digger something nice."

"What did you say you dog loving bitch!" Haku screeches. This is going nowhere I want it to go.

"Why can't we be friends! Why can't we be friends? Why can't we be friends! Why can't we be friends!" They stopped bickering to look at me dumbly. Hey my singing is great just so that you know.

"Great now that I have your undivided attention…my friend and I shall take our leave Haku enjoy your new boyfriend my best wishes to you and have a nice day gentlemen Kiba…lets scoot boot and boogie alright? Alright. Pleasure really it was." I start to walk around the black wearing mass yanking Kiba with me.

A hand. A hand was planted right smack dab in the middle of my chest, none to gently I might add, and abruptly brought me to a halt.

"Are you the guy who two timed Haku, then started stalking him. And when he continued to refuse you, you began to spread rumors around about him?" The man's voice was so sensual, low, deep, and nerve wreaking. It makes me shiver. In what I can't tell but right now it's probably because he's very creepy.

Wait… what? Back track.

What the fuck is this guy talking about…

"Hell to the fucking no! Haku you bitch gawd you broke up with me! You just called me this morning asking to get back together! What the fuck is your-"

Geezus lord it hit me so fast I didn't have time to block. Next thing I know Kiba's supporting me all over again.

Then all hell broke loose.

The mall cop's backup finally came and me and Kiba were seen getting ganged up on, so they came over to help us out I mean really, and somehow they got bribed with money and Kiba got dragged away somewhere and I got stuck with Haku and Mr. Let-Me-Punch-Honest-Dudes-Who-Have-Bad-Tastes-In-Boyfriends-And-Said-Boyfriends-Are-Fucking-Elaborate-Habitual-Liars!

"Take it easy on him baby he can help you out at the office, you've been looking for someone right? You can use him and make him feel as bad as he made me feel right baby? He's like a house wife. He cooks, cleans, runs errands, and all does all kinds of house hold stuff. Probably the only thing he is good for."

The damn sexy evil man looks at me with eyes meant for the lowest of the low.

Wait? Sexy. Ugh well I guess anyone in a business suit looks good. Excpecially this guy with his marble skin, strong cheek bones, sharp eyes, defined nose and chin, and look at that…You don't have fucking time to think like this! Get a hold of yourself man!

I start to shake my head at my crazy thoughts. So lost was I in said thoughts that I was quite startled when the sexy, evil, bastard began to speak.

"You…" Oh so now my name is you…bitch. He tosses a card in my lap that doesn't even make it to my lap because it's a flimsy piece of wannabe cardboard. Oh by the way I'm on the floor how and why I don't know. It just happened.

"Come to that address tomorrow at 6. Be there or my people will find you instead."

"I don't think so I have college to attend thank you very much." He narrows his eyes at me.

"Squint all you like to I have a life." A foot collides with my chest and my head bounces on the floor. Shit man! That's tile!

I groan. Fuck did that shit hurt.

"Be there or my people with find you instead." What a hooker.

"Oh Haku don't you ever come near me again. *Hhiisss* Don't you ever! Come near me again!" the foot pushes harder.

"It should be me telling you don't come near Haku again or you will regret it."

"Fuck off bitch!" The foot press down one more time and then leaves.

"See you tomorrow Naruto." Haku that cheeky bitch called out to me.

I just laid there on the floor. People just passing by and what not.

"What? Never seen somebody laying on the floor before!" Gawd I hate it when people stare….and put there foot in my chest.

* * *

(1) The Quarter Back

So did you like it! If you liked it i write another chapter if not well im not gonna waste your time lol ill try again next time.

Hopeing against hope that you enjoyed

Psychotic

Ja'ne


	2. You gotta be kidding me

Hello! I'm back!Lol about 25 people favorited this story! So how about you 25 people leave a comment please!

It makes me feel better and it makes me want to keep typeing lol! Um first fanfic remember!

This is Yaoi!

I do not own or this would not be a children's show!

I have a lovely beta this time!

Thank you ZeroPanda!

Again I'm telling you this is just my idea of a good time, partically inspired by totally captivated!

Enjoy Phychotic!

And review! Please.

* * *

**Naruto's POV scene takes place back at Naruto's room.**

"Ever *hiisss* heard of being fucking gentle before! OUCH! Damn it Kiba be gentle! OUCH! For fucks sake man! Give me that!" I snatch the cotton swab drenched in alcohol from him.

"Fuck man it feels like you're trying to shove it in the cut!" a groan leaves Kiba's mouth. I tentatively dab the spot on my face. Ouch. Maybe Kiba was trying to be gentle…nah it hurts a lot less when I do it myself.

"You're such a pussy man! Grow a pair!" I shove him with the hand that is not attending the cut on my face that I can't trust my best friend with!

"I have a pair! A very nice heavy pair, you wanna look faggot?" Kiba out right laughs and I don't see what's so funny.

"Why are you always-OWFUCKINFLIPINHELL- so obsessed with people's balls or lack thereof?" Kiba looks like he is having a seizure on the floor and my face is killing me! Ugh why did that guy have to hit so hard!

"Man Naruto, you sure know how to pick 'em! A lyin' gold digger for a boyfriend, excuse me EX boyfriend, who now dates a loan shark. In case you were wondering where they dragged me off to we actually went to Starbucks. That Shino is a real creeper…" Wait what?

"Wait…what? They took you to Starbucks and you went? Willingly! Da fuck! A loan shark! Shino is a real creeper? Who the duck is Shino?" Kiba gives me a pointed stare.

"When did you turn into a parrot? You are having a very, very slow day today my friend. Maybe all those tackles are finally starting to catch up with you man." I glance around quickly and spot a pillow. Said pillow is now being launched at Kiba's head.

"Fuck off man and answer the damn questions!" He's laughing again. I hope he chokes on his spit…

"No, I will not fuck off and there was a gun to my back but no one seemed to notice. I mean really even as we ordered coffee with the gun in my back no one noticed." Pfft his eye is twitching! Oh that looks so weird. It must have been traumatizing. "And Mr. Uchiha makes mad money off of it apparently." Well duh dumb ass. Wait what?

"Wait…what? Mr. Uchiha?" Kiba looks at me as if Oprah was sitting on my head.

"Stop doing that! You're not a damn parrot! Mr. Uchiha is the loan shark! The one who decked you in the face." Oh.

"Ugh this whole situation hurts my head just thinking about it." I throw the bloody cotton swab into a little orange trash bin about 5 feet away next to my door. "So what are you going to do about this?"

"It still hasn't caught up with me yet I guess… I just can't wrap my mind around the idea of a…loan shark. For one thing tomorrow we are going to football practice." The pillow I threw at Kiba gets thrown back at my face.

"You don't have an option in that we have a game this Saturday night and you will be there at every practice this week." I grab the pillow and shove my face in it and scream briefly.

"You really are a princess…" the fuck is up with these random statements.

"Fuck off and get me some Advil, please." The bed springs back up when Kiba's fat ass gets off of it, and I fall onto my back with the pillow clutched tightly to my chest.

Really though what am I going to do about this whole thing? I mean really I don't want to get involved in anything that could possibly make me a liability. I'm too young for this! Whatever this is. Wait! There is no this really because I haven't consented to this, because this is not happening, and I am not participating in this, so thus this does not exist!

There. Problem solved.

I am not doing anything about this because this does not exist and this is not my problem.

Wow, I feel a lot better now.

The bed dips signaling Kiba's return to my bed, and also means he has retrieved my Advil, which also means I'm going to feel even better. "Well today was a bust," Kiba so brilliantly points out.

I remove the pillow from my face to see Kiba's expression oddly serious. Not that he always goofs off or anything but he looks really, I don't know, bothered.

"What can I do to make this day up to you hm?" I say. Kiba looks at me and I mean really looks at me.

"Let's go get some ice cream." He doesn't sound jovial like he normally does at the mention of the delicious frozen dairy product. "Is something wrong Kiba?" He just turns his head away from me, stands up, offers a hand to me without looking at me, and stays silent.

Oh noo, no, no, no, no. The princess has just denied the prince's actions. I grab hold of his hand and tighten my grip on it. "Hey! Prince! Your princess is talking to you!" I yank his arm over my body and he really wasn't paying attention so he just falls on me. Ugh good thing I have the pillow on my chest. He grunts with his head on my shoulder.

We stay silent for a while. I'm trying to catch my breath, and him just being quiet.

"What are you gonna do Naru? Be serious. I know what you're thinking and no matter how much you ignore this problem it's not going to go away. No matter how tough we talk…he said he is going to send people to come get you at 6 o'clock man." Practice ends at 7, I know what he's hinting at. I have a job Monday through Friday from 9-11 or whenever they need extra help and I'm not too exhausted.

I turn my head to the right a little to look at Kiba's face. I am intercepted by fierce chocolate brown eyes. Kiba really is a handsome guy. I lift my left hand to ruffle his hair in a good natured way. His serious look never leaves his face and he just continues to look at me. Sigh.

"Let's go get some ice cream." He gives a curt nod.

. O.o . O.o

As I think about it we ended up staying like that for a good 5 more minutes, just staring at each other. No homo.

Currently we are debating who is going to pay.

"I might be fish bait tomorrow and you won't pay for ice cream!" I throw my hands in the air in exasperation.

"Don't even play like that!" he snaps back.

"Then buy me a frozen confection!" he crosses his arms over his broad chest and looks down at me.

"The prince is not always paying for the androgynous princess!" I gawk at him. Oh no he didn't!

"What did you just call me!" people are starting to stare.

"An Androgynous Princess! Now buy me ice cream damn it!" I glare at him but whip out my wallet.

Kiba smirks. Cocky bitch.

For the rest of the night we ignore the up and coming doom and goof off till we fall asleep on my bed.

All in all it wasn't a bad day...kinda.

O.o . o.O .

**_You were a problem child_**

**_Been grounded your whole life_**

**_So now you runnin' wild_**

**_Playin' with them good girls_**

**_No that ain't your style._**

**_You think you're hot shit and I love it_**

**_I love it yeah, yeah_**

_'Noooooo! It can't be morning already!"_

**_Stumblin' but yeah you still lookin hella fine_**

**_Keep doin' what your doin' and I'ma make you mine_**

_'What the hell was I thinking when I made that my alarm?'_

**_Well you're a hot mess and I'm fallin' for you_**

**_And I'm like "hot damn, lemme make you my boo."_**

**_'Cuz you can shake it, shake it, shake it_**

**_Yeah you know what to do_**

**_You're a hot mess_**

**_I'm lovin' it hell yes!_**

"Na'to Uzuraki if you don't shutdat the hell off your ass'll be thrown out the winflo" Kiba yawn/grumbles at me. Ungrateful ass. He could sleep on the perfectly good, non-lumpy sofa in the living room. So I do what any hospitable host does… I kicked him out of the bed and got a rather loud screech in return.

"Shuddap! Go cook something I'm taking a shower and…and doing morning stuff." I hear a grunt from the floor and will myself to roll onto my stomach.

45 min later

"Fuck you! It's your fault the food is burnt! I should have known better than to ask you to cook breakfast!" not only is there a sick smell coming from my kitchen, but now there is also a massive mess that I have to clean up when I get home. I really must not have been awake.

"Hey we already agreed as to whom takes on the female role in our relationship. So I don't see wh-"

"Whoah! Sexist much!" we ran down the emergency stair case taking 2-3 steps at time because the elevator is too slow. I do live on the 4th floor of a 6 floor building.

"See!" he hisses at me. I just turn to him with a glare then push the door open and walk out. Hmph! I hope it hits him.

"That is exactly what I'm talking about!" he yells after me. "You are so sensitive!" I spin on my heel just in time to see him fling his arms around in aggravation while trying to stop and not run into me because of my abrupt halt, and I look up into his eyes.

"You are such a, a, fuck it we don't have time for this whose car are we taking?" I start jogging to the front door. He chuckles and jogs after me till we are in stride and he pulls out his keys.

"Since I'm on this sexist streak apparently, I'm just gonna go with the flow and tell you that since you are the woman in this relationship…you can't drive. Hey! Watch where you're swinging your fist! You can really hurt yourself like that baby!" I punch him in the arm since he keeps dodging when I aim for his face.

"Sleep with one eye open and watch your back Kiba!" I thrust my trusty middle finger out while reaching for the car door handle, ready to wrench it open. I'd like to say that I said that in a very manly voice that held no screeching in it whatsoever. Then I slam the door to his red Ford F150 that has a giant black stripe going down the middle of it.

"Ouch! Be gentle to my baby, baby!" It is currently 6:13 AM and I am already ready to choke down some cyanide! No! I take that back…I'm ready to feed my professors, Kiba, and everyone else who pisses me off a nice steaming cup of cyanide!

"Don't call me baby and drive asshole we're going to be late! I might not seem like it but I care about my grades!" He snorts and puts the thing in gear.

**It is now 4:34… PM You don't care about Naruto's college classes do you? No, no you don't Normal POV**

"Hey QB! You ready to get whooped?" a heavy arm is flung across Naruto's shoulders as he enters the locker room.

"Ugh! You already smell like ass! We haven't even DONE anything yet!" was the blonde's harsh reply as he tried to pry the large brunette's meaty arm off of him. But the meaty arm had a different idea of how this was going to go down and coiled around Naruto's neck. The meaty arm then tightened thus forcing the poor blonde's nose into the meaty arm's pit.

"Oh gawd! Nooo! Zabuza! That is so rank! Ack! Stop! Stop it! KIBA!" a dark chuckle comes from the brunette that is shoving the blonde's face in his arm pit. Said brunette's name is, if you haven't figured it out already, Zabuza.

Zabuza is a tall, bulky, brunetet with hair that defies gravity. But he's really creepy…kind of like their running back…Sai…he's even creepier though. Anyways Zabuza has these freakishly sharp teeth that are shaped like triangles. But they are straight and white so that is a plus. He has sharp, calculating, deep brown eyes, and is a force to be reckoned with. His is one of the best linemen I have ever seen…after Kiba that is.

If I had to describe Zabuza to the overall public I would call him a wannabe bad boy.

"Oh? What's this? Calling for your prince already princess? And you know yelling into my arm pit is just putting said rank in your mouth." His rough gravelly voice sounded hoarse and gruff; perfectly fitting for his overall appearance. Those who don't know him on the football field know him as a gangster looking, serious, evil, vindictive, evil, mean, evil person. Those on the football field know he's all of those things to the opponents, but to them he's a sweet, cuddly, sometimes evil, prankster.

Zabuza gave a malicious chuckle when Kiba came over with a shit eating grin on his face.

"Zabuza, please let go of Naruto before he is traumatized by your arm pit stank forever. Not everyone is like us, Zabuza. Some people don't like to work out until it is work out time. You and I like to keep up our sexy appearance." Zabuza give a shit eating grin in return and nods his head in agreement. "Naruto on the other hand, he and I established something this morning, let's just say that we have discovered that he is very…sensitive"

Zabuza throws his head back so roughly and cackles so loudly that Naruto's body is actually yanked off the ground for a second and left to dangle, while choking, and is unheard while wailing his misery.

Kiba notices quickly though and wraps his arms around his friend's waist and yanks him from Zabuza's prison.

"Pfft, how long has he been denying that! Oh Kiba you're so in the doghouse now! Wow. If they're on offence they normally are sensitive…except for Sai…he's so…" Zabuza walks off to his locker shaking his head.

Kiba laughs and Naruto can feel the vibrations in his back. Naruto is limp in Kiba's arms and a spark of worry actually goes off in Kiba's mind.

Maybe Zabuza's arm pit was truly traumatizing.

"Naru? You ok?" Naruto is unresponsive, and is still dangling in the air in Kiba's arms. So Kiba does what any logical person would do and starts to…shake him in the air!

Naruto then responds by kicking and screa-cough I mean, demanding things in a manly voice. "For the love of all that is holy! Put! Me! Down!" so Kiba does just that. Kiba unceremoniously drops Naruto.

"Naruto, man up. You are at football practice and you're acting like a little girl. I'm getting sick of this. Now go get changed." Talk about a mood swing. Naruto just stares at Kiba's retreating back with his mouth open in aggravation. Suddenly the fun aura in the locker room turns into a dark one; all the boys in the room just stare at Naruto. Naruto bites his lip, squeezes his eyes shut and bounces back up.

"Alright ladies…get ready for hell." Naruto growls while going to his locker. Many of the boys were now ready to go out and pummel Kiba into the ground. Last time Naruto was like this, nobody could catch any of his passes. They were too hard and too strong. And when they had to tackle the dummies he was pushing the whole thing back on his own about 40 feet, then back at throwing passes no one could catch. Yes it did get the team working harder, but with Naruto in such a bad mood it made the practice seem longer and like… well, hell.

"Hey, pussy we could always let a real quarter back play until you're over your little tantrum." Naruto really did not need this from Kabuto right now.

"Look faggot, if coach Kakashi or coach Gai wanted me to be a second string quarter back you would be playing on Saturday night's game now wouldn't you. Are you? No. I am. I am also captain of this team by vote. What are you? Oh that's right, second string quarter back, because of your nasty attitude and shitty throws in comparison to mine. Now back the fuck off and go suit up…pussy." Naruto by now was already suited up and slammed his locker door shut. "That goes for all of you ladies! Let's have a productive practice today." And Naruto walked out.

The time is currently 5 o'clock.

Small time skip - 5:30! Practice ends at 7 o'clock

Whistles blew, grunts made, organized chaos; that's what this football practice was. Clusters of people based off of string, position, and skills dotted the indoor football stadium. It looks like a really good practice except for a very pissed defensive side.

"Catch it damn it!" Kiba throws his helmet to the floor in anger. Kiba knew he pissed Naruto off. He knew it and really he cared but he was having a moment. A moment of bitchiness and everyone is entitled to their own moment right! Right. Kiba just decided to take his moment at an inopportune time. Suddenly something hard collides with Kiba's back and he stumbles forward.

"Kiba Inuzuka! Focus on your own tasks of youth! Your enthusiasm is appreciated but if you can't make your own youthful tackles how will you stop your youthful opponents! Now 10 laps for losing focus then get back to your youthful reps," Coach Gai said.

Coach Gai is a man who is in love with green spandex, has massive bushy eyebrows, and is obsessed with the word youthful. So is his son who we feel bad for since he is just like his father…poor Lee. They are way too exuberant. Coach Gai is the defensive coach and coach Kakashi is the offensive coach. Kakashi is head coach but he and Gai were on the same Super Bowl team so I guess Kakashi split his position with Gai.

"Damn he hits too hard." Kiba gave one more glance at the offensive side's practice before cursing and taking off for his laps in the indoor stadium, 2 billion dollar indoor stadium to be exact. But Kiba couldn't help it! He just voiced what every other defensive player was thinking.

Naruto's throws this whole practice were so precise, so accurate, just so fucking clean that it pissed them off every time the ball hit, like literally hit, whomever the catcher's hands were and they would recoil their hands back or drop the ball, or the ball would fall through their fingers.

It was very infuriating and the whole defensive line was ready to blow. Even Zabuza looked extremely pissed. And that's saying something; Zabuza had even thrown down his own helmet and started to pace in angry lines.

"Naruto," a smooth deep voice called. The golden blond looked over to his coach to see him with his nose stuck in his little orange book.

A man with gravity defying hair like Zabuza's, but white strode over to Naruto. "I know you're upset. And as the captain, your attitude leaks out into your players. You're making them nervous. You're not cheering them on, you're not smiling, you're not saying anything really, you're being too detached." Naruto knew this but he just continued to stare blankly at Kakashi. His blue eyes were hard as steel and he didn't seem to be having fun at all. Naruto normally had some kind of fun.

Kakashi is a lean man of 28 years but with the mask on his face no one really could tell. He was taller than Naruto by a good 6 inches, and for a coach he was pretty well built. But that's about all people could tell about him.

"We can make Kiba run until he pukes if that's what it takes but you need to relax." Kakashi's eye turned into U's and he walked away. Kakashi has this mask on his face that allows only one eye to show…kinda creepy, but he is a very good coach and really knows how to make someone think, and occasionally feel good about themselves.

Naruto's eyes finally lighten up and he sighs "No, don't make him run till he pukes just make him clean the balls or something please. ALRIGHT LADIES! GET YOUR HEADS OUT OF YOUR ASSES AND CATCH THESE PASSES! Man, I should be a cheer leader!" the blond started smiling, completely forgetting about the time.

A lean arm is flung around his shoulders and he is met by the smiling face of the creepiest, most annoying, stupidest, anymore mean words that end with est, person he has ever met. Sai.

"Good to have you back dickless, I was about to hit you with the football or throw you in the garbage can if you persisted with your evil streak." Naruto's right eye had a spasm and he tried to calm down.

"Fuck off and go catch my passes running back!" Naruto spat.

"Kiba! You will be cleaning balls for the rest of practice! Hop to it!" Kakashi bellowed in a happy voice, face still stuck in his little orange book.

"WHAT! NARUTO THIS BETTER NOT BE YOUR FAULT!" Naruto didn't even dignify him with a response he just continued to throw passes that miraculously were now being caught! All is right in the world again.

"Hello, Kakashi Hatake speaking this better be good, you're interrupting football practice." Kakashi's face was still in the book he was reading. A smooth, deep, calm voice responded back.

"Kakashi…find Naruto Uzumaki and haul his stupid ass to my office now. Good bye." Kakashi blinked as a dial tone was given to his ear.

Kakashi carefully closed his book and pocketed it, hit redial on his phone and waited.

"What did you not understand about my orders Kakashi." It was a statement not a question.

"What do you want with him." There was silence on the other end for a while, only yells whistles hoots and hollers were heard in the background.

"He is going to work for me. Nothing to do with the business just a whim of my newest…partner." Kakashi was silent for a minute then responded.

"You will do nothing to that child am I understood? If you do anything you will regret it severely. Am I understood?" It wasn't a question.

"Are you threatening me?" the voice was cold on the other end. But Kakashi's was gravely serious as well.

"You are asking for my teacher's son, my star quarter back, and a very good kid. No Sasuke, I am not threatening you I am promising you." Then Kakashi hung up.

"No one gives me the dial tone," Kakashi said under his breath. Then he proceeded to pull out his little orange book.

At 6:30 Kakashi strode over to Naruto, still reading his book, simply picked him up with one arm, threw him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, and walked away.

Naruto kicked and hollered the whole time until he was set on his feet in the locker room.

"Change." Kakashi leaned on some locker and continued to read his book. When Naruto didn't move and still looked dumbfounded Kakashi sighed.

"Wasn't there somewhere you were supposed to be at 6 o'clock?" Kakashi peered over his books to see Naruto's skin look visibly paler. Kakashi sighed again while straightening up and walking over to Naruto.

"Do I need to undress you?" the reaction was quick and kind of insulting to Kakashi. Naruto tried to meld himself with the locker while vehemently shaking his head no. Kakashi frowned at this.

"Do you find me ugly?" Naruto looked puzzled for a minute then he frowned deeply.

"I-I-I wouldn't know if you were ugly since I've never seen your face, and-and it's not that you're not attractive- not that I think you are-I mean that you're not attractive that is to say I-I- No! You work for that Uchiha bastard!" Naruto pointed an accusing finger then quickly snapped his hand back to his chest when Kakashi stepped towards him again.

"And if I said I did? You're still my student and I'm still your coach." Kakashi gave another one of those U smiles he does. "Now get changed before I change you." Kakashi then leaned back onto a locker while reading his book.

Naruto began to look around nervously. "Um-ano- are you going to just…stand there?" Kakashi was now the puzzled one.

"Yes, why?" Kakashi looked up once more to see a cute blushing Naruto. Cute? Not liking where this was going Kakashi once again straightened up and looked at Naruto with his one eye.

"You change in front of the whole locker room and now you can't change in front of your coach?" Kakashi shook his head playfully grabbed the door handle and stepped out. But before the door closed he said

"Don't try to run."

* * *

**Review! Please anything!**

**Lol let me know if you like it! If you like it i continue!**

**Also I try to get my updates out at soon as possible. There will be maybe a time spand of a week in between each post but i will get it out...if im not dead O.o...**

**Review! :D **

**Ja'ne!**


	3. You want me to what

Hello! I'm back!Lol about 45 people favorited this story! So how about you 45 people leave a comment please!

It makes me feel better and it makes me want to keep typeing lol! Um first fanfic remember!

This is Yaoi!

I do not own or this would not be a children's show!

I have a lovely beta again!

Thank you ZeroPanda!

Again I'm telling you this is just my idea of a good time, partically inspired by totally captivated!

Enjoy Phychotic!

And **review**! Please.

* * *

**Normal POV**

I'm just going to be honest with you. Naruto was freaked the heck out! No seriously. The golden boy was actually starting to become paranoid.

"Kakashi…Kakashi! He has Kakashi working for him! What next, the janitor!" Startling sapphire blue eyes widened as he realized he said that out loud. The blond then realized something else and his back smacked harshly into the lockers behind him. His arms were spread out to his sides and his legs were shoulder width apart. He then whipped his head back and forth…then up and down.

'Were there cameras in here! Did this bastard whose name he didn't even know have this place wired!'

Yes, Naruto was quite freaked out.

**Bang Bang Bang**

"Hurry up in there."

A tan hand reaches up to tangle in golden tresses. Naruto was not stressed…no sir ree bob.

'Breathe Naruto, breathe! Ok first, change your clothes.'

The golden child began to undress himself in a hurried fashion.

'Jersey, pads, pants…no shoes, then pants, underwe-no other pads, cup…no keep cup on just in case,' 10 min later Naru was all showered and ready to bolt…I mean cooperate with Kakashi's wishes.

He stepped out just as Kakashi straightened himself off the wall. Kakashi gently tucked away his book, clapped his hands together and began walking to the exit of the stadium.

Naruto first looked around to see if he could bolt but then…he had practice tomorrow…he couldn't just not show up…or could he? He could just tran-

"I have to approve of your transfer. And I highly doubt you'll be able to get on a football team as good as this one." Naruto jumped a mile high and felt his skin crawl from the moment Kakashi said approve. Naruto hugged himself tightly and scream -cough- yelled very loudly.

"YOU WERE WALKING IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION! YOU'RE NOT A NINJA DEAR GEEZUS LORD DON'T YOU DARE SAY YOU ARE! WALK! WALK TO THE EXIT! I SAID WALK DAMN IT!" Oh yes indeed Naruto was very freaked out.

Kakashi just snickered as he walked to the exit a frightened blond in tow.

**In the office of a very…just read**

The office is haze, dark, and just down right depressing. Perfect for a loan shark eh?

"Oh Sasu-baby! Come on!" the voice whined unappealingly. "Your subordinates like me! Isn't that all that matters? I'm sure they won't care if you give your baby some lip lock right?" oh they cared…they just didn't say anything. A pale slender hand starts to run up a strong looking broad chest that is decked out in a black collared shirt.

The man, exasperated with the slender male's attempts to seduce him, just resigns himself to molestation, and tells the slender male "Then come and get it." With a voice the other couldn't possibly refuse. Suddenly the door slams open with a bang.

"YOU ARE SUCH A…I DON'T KNOW YET! OH DEAR LOGS OF FALLEN TREES! YOU CAN'T BE MY COACH! YOU PERVERTED PIECE OF-Haku?" A boisterous, golden blond, holding eyes like burning sapphires, and all around sparkling person enters the room first. An androgynous boy looks up from his position on the dark shirted man's lap with a snap of his neck as if he got his hand caught in a cookie jar.

Naruto is confused for a second. Then it clicks. And like the eye of a storm all was momentarily calm…too calm. Kakashi steps through the door after the blond and just slings an arm around his waist. "Oh but Naruto it was just too much fun." Kakashi oblivious or just not caring about the tension in the room just doubled it.

"So now you're gay for your coach too?" Haku sneers. Naruto moves in a quick fast motion, or would have if not for the hand on his waist. Naruto growls low in his throat sending off warning alarms to all occupants in the room.

KaChack

A gun is pressed against Naruto's temple. Naruto doesn't even flinch…just kidding. Naruto jumps and squeals but once again Kakashi's hand keeps him to Kakashi's side.

KaChack

Kakashi just smiles as his other hand holds a gun to the person's forehead who is holding a gun to Naruto's temple.

"How troublesome. Neji, put the gun down," a very nonchalant voice speaks up as if this was the most normal sentence in the world. Naruto was angry at that tone, and answer.

A pale eyed boy with long hair and broad shoulders grudgingly puts his gun down.

"So this is how you do business? Gawd I'm so glad I didn't expect better of you guys! You're just as I predicted. So what do you want because I really don't want to hang around such a-" Naruto took a glance around and his face screwed up in disgust. "filthy place! Ugh! Aren't you a loan shark! That means you have money. I know your prissy looking ass doesn't clean shit so go hire somebo- OH MY GEEZUS! KAKASHI! KAKASHI! THAT PIZZA BOX JUST MOVED!" Naruto yells Kakashi's name while steadily beating and clawing at his arm. What else could he do? The blond was appalled and scared.

"Shut up…you're annoying." The pale man Haku was practically plastered to grunts. "This is your new job. Working for me. Doing whatever I tell you, whenever I tell you…stalker." The dark/freakishly pale man gestures with one hand to his surroundings.

'Stalker! Fuck that shit! No!'

"First of all I already have a job. A nice stable job where I meet nice people and backstabbing, lying, bitches, who say they love you, then dump you when you miss their anniversary because you have a football game that gives you a scholarship to stay in school so you can make something of yourself!" heavy breaths fell from Naruto after such a long sentence. "And second of all," the blond continued breathlessly "I am not you hear me, not a stalker!" Haku looked impassive but on the inside he felt guilty. But there was a reason to his madness.

"No, actually you don't have a job anymore. I put a hit out on you so…you got fired. They will send you your last paycheck tomorrow."

Silence…that is except for the moving pizza box that shuffled across the floor.

"The fuck! Why!" an exhausted and most definitely frustrated sigh is released from the one named Mr. Uchiha.

"I thought I just explained why dobe." The man's voice is void of emotion. This just pisses Naruto off to an even higher level.

_'oh if only I could shove my foot so far up his ass! No…he might enjoy that…sick fucker.'_

"You must have lost your mind! I am out of this psychotic (**A/N** LOL) house." Naruto moves to turn around only to come to an abrupt halt by a large, firm, heavy hand on his shoulder.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you." The words are spoken with a lazy drawl. Naruto looks at the hand with distain and allows his eyes to trail a path up the thick wrist, lean arm, big shoulder, strong neck, and into the face of pure indifference. Although this person who Naruto would rather not have touching him looked relax, his eyes were alert and something about him made Naruto rethink his actions.

Naruto glares up at this person with his gorgeous blue eyes and roughly shrugs off their hand.

"I need that job to pay for things I need and want. I'm not going to work here because you want me to." The angry blond hisses at the tall man as if it was his fault he was here.

The tall man was a brunet and held his hair high on his head in a ponytail. It looked like a pineapple to be fair. He has light skin and looks bored as all hell.

"I'll pay you if it means my…baby is happy" was that hesitation Naruto heard or was he just hearing things? Well it's not like he gave two fucks anyways.

"Oh so your baby is going to be the one playing with me? Don't let me get him alone lord knows what I do to that little body of his…right Haku?" Said young man squirms out of the pale/dark man's grasp stomps over to Naruto, brown hair flying and swings at his face. It didn't make impact because the blond swiftly dodged it, but Naruto was immediately detained into a broad chest with steel arms wrapped around his body. Naruto throws his head back viciously only to look back up into those alert eyes and indifferent face. His deep cerulean eyes narrow.

"I don't do the touchy feely shit on the first date so I would like for you to let me go…whoever you are!" Naruto sneers. He still doesn't seem to realize that it's hard to be vicious when you're shorter than your opponents. So he thrashes wildly in the arms of the man. Meanwhile Haku stomps out of the office slamming the door after himself.

"So troublesome…Shikamaru… Shikamaru Nara, Naruto Uzumaki." The arms just constrict tighter until the blond just stops struggling.

Shikamaru frowned at this momentarily. It just seemed odd for the blond not to be all resistant. Even though Naruto stopped struggling Shikamaru still held him close.

"You will start working tomorrow at 4:00 PM until I release y-" The dark man was cut off sharply by a way too chilled coach for Naruto's liking.

"And this is where I come in Sasuke." Kakashi gives one of his closed eye smiles and continues to talk to a now angry looking Sasuke.

"You will release him by 5 since it takes him about 30 minutes to get here and that's if traffic is decent, because he has football practice. Or you can study his schedule and get him to come here whenever he is free. You will not take my Quarter Back and team Captain from me. That is all."

A wild burst of laughter comes from the blond in Shikamaru's arms drawing everyone's attention in the room.

"You guys are rich! Wow, good times good times. Now Mr. Nara-" Naruto was still looking up at the brunet named Shikamaru who just cut him off. "Shikamaru"

"Fine, Shikamaru if you will be so kind as to let the fuck go of me so I can leave, sleep this off and pretend it never happened. Sound good to you? Sounds good to me so…" Naruto drops, or attempts to drop out of Shikamaru's hold, only to find himself dangling when this person lifts him off the ground with arms still firmly wrapped around him.

"Oh fuck you too jerk!" Naruto whines. He is then promptly plopped onto a nice looking sofa…if not for the empty plates and soda cans! Ugh!

"Give me your schedule." Shikamaru sinks down onto his haunches staring straight into Naruto's eyes.

"And if I refuse?" Naruto asks while lifting a golden eye brow.

"Kakashi I will take him home now." Two other lackeys, as Naruto likes to put it, stand up and walk over to him.

Horrified Naruto says the first thing on his mind.

"Are you lying and really going to take me to some old ally to rough me up until I cave and if I don'!" His voice began to travel up octaves as he babbled about his inevitable demise.

Shikamaru actually cracked a smile at that. "No we are taking you home to investigate and figure out your schedule since you won't tell me. I'm not going to force you at all."

Whispers amongst the lackeys filters through Naruto's ears and he almost smiles at what he hears, but is too wrapped up in trying to gauge the truthfulness in Mr. Nara- Shikamaru's words.

"Has Shikamaru ever talked this much before?" someone said kind of loudly much to Shikamaru's displeasure.

This time Naruto did crack a smile. And Shikamaru at least had the decency to look a tad embarrassed by turning his head away from Naruto's eyes.

"Looks like you're coming to my house then now doesn't it?" Naruto's blue eyes shine with something mischievous, and Shikamaru huffs. "So troublesome"

This fun moment for the blond and Shikamaru was then interrupted by "The Boss" a.k.a Sasuke.

"I expect you to find out his schedule, give a live report on just how cleanly the stalker is, and a schedule for how he is going to come here from day to day. Got it?" With this Sasuke spins around in his overly large leather chair, that doesn't look that comfortable anyways, facing out a large window obviously meaning to dismiss everybody from his office. "And clean up your shit. Someone catch that pizza box." It was so nonchalant that Naruto was ready to bust a blood vessel in his head from aggravation.

"Yes sir," everyone in the room replies.

"And Mr. Uzumaki, know that what I say goes. Kakashi I think your leash is a little too long for you to handle. Do we need to retract some?"

"No sir," is the almost quiet reply. "Good, and you Mr. Uzumaki? Do you understand?" I guess he really wasn't expecting an answer, because when Naruto did he was promptly thrown over a smirking Shikamaru's shoulder and briskly hauled out the room with long strides trailed by a snickering Kakashi.

"Oh I understand. I understand that you are a prissy ass bastard who doesn't know how to clean up after himself you little nasty! Ugh I mean really can you wipe your own ass or are there skid marks in there. Better yet I don't wanna know you loser! Don't call me back here! Do you hear me!"

Even as his voice trailed off in the distance a very disturbed, pissed, and amused Sasuke Uchiha couldn't help saying

"I hear ya dobe" oh so very quietly.

* * *

**Review! Please anything!**

**Lol let me know if you like it! If you like it i continue! I know it's short this time but yeah. **

**Also I try to get my updates out at soon as possible. There will be maybe a time spand of a week in between each post but i will get it out...if im not dead O.o...**

**Review! :D **

**Ja'ne!**


	4. You don't know me

Hello! I'm back! No I did not fall off the face of the earth...well about 90 people or more are reading this story so why the hello kitty won't you people review...sigh...

It makes me feel good that so many people are review and it makes me want to keep typeing lol, but it also makes me feel unloved that you don't review! Well i am late because well shit happens and so yeah... Um first fanfic remember!

This is Yaoi!

I do not own or this would not be a children's show!

My beta is the lovely ZeroPanda of awasomeness!

Again I'm telling you this is just my idea of a good time, partically inspired by totally captivated!

Enjoy Phychotic!

And **review**! Please.

* * *

Sasuke Uchiha would admit…he was still quite amused by the events that took place yesterday. He actually enjoyed hearing all kinds of reactions from the blonde. Sasuke truly believes that the blond will be very fun to mess with.

Sasuke is not stupid. Oh far from it. He is a prodigy. He is amazing. He is an Uchiha.

Sasuke is quite aware of the fact that Haku is lying to him. Sasuke is also beginning to think he is being used to make a blond jealous. He is also quite aware of how gorgeous and lively that blond is. This leads to the fact that he really doesn't like Haku and he only picked him up on a whim. Which also leads to the Uchiha wondering how long this little game will be playing out for, all these thoughts and more just amuse Sasuke greatly.

So his amusement only continued to climb as he looked at the pictures of the feisty blonde's house.

"Hn," Sasuke was trying to figure out why he was so unsurprised yet surprised. "This is his apartment and he lives alone…you're shitting me right" no emotion was present on the Uchiha's face but his mirth was quite evident in his eyes as he continues to just stare at the pictures that were just presented to him by his subordinates.

"So troublesome…" a very tired looking man with a pineapple shaped head says.

"I shit you not boss man, this guy is OCD to the 100th degree. I mean seriously I think he vacuumed were my butt was when I farted in the couch." A large black man with really pointy teeth, multiple tattoos, and a very crazed look in his eye named Kisame says with a loud chuckle.

Large pale hands reach up to rub equally pale temples. "Are you sure he is a boy?" he looked up into the faces of a very indifferent looking Shikamaru and a very demented looking black man with good hair and very fucking pointy teeth. _'How did he get them like that? Did he use a file or was he born that way…I bet he's the reason parents don't have sex when there prego…he would probably bite the head…his fucking weirdness is getting to me…'_

"Kisame…when is my brother coming to pick you up? I can't understand why he keeps you around aside from the fact that you are a walking freight train…"

Another large pointy teeth evil smile is directed at the Uchiha and he can only sigh.

"Why thank you littlest Uchiha! You could have just said "Kisame you're a dame good body guard! So good I would suck you o-" a stapler collides harshly with the man's head…he doesn't even flinch. To the contraire, Kisame chuckles in delight. "So is he going to be your little errand boy for now on or what. He's hellova fun person to mess with Sasuke." The pale hands seemed to have begun to rub equally pale temples harder.

"As soon as I get his-" a piece of paper was shoved under his nose from the pineapple head man.

"There is his schedule. I hope you intend on paying him he really does pay for everything he owns by himself." A huff was heard from the pale man and the other two occupants in the room took that as a yes.

oOoOoOoOoO**And so it begins**OoOoOoOoOo

**Normal POV**

**_You might see me in the street_**

**_But Shorty you don't know me_**

**_When ya holla on the street_**

**_Rememba you don't know me_**

**_Save all the hatin and the poppin_**

**_Pimpin you don't know me_**

**_Quit tellin People you my partna_**

**_Listen you don't know me_**

**_Don't be a groupie keep it movin_**

**_Shorty you don't know me_**

**_Hey I ain't trippin pimp the truth is_**

**_Really you don't know me_**

**It's about 6:00 AM and Naruto is about to lose his mind when his phone goes off. **

"Fuck I hate it when people get my number and I don't know who the fuck they are!" Kiba snorts next to Naruto at his comment.

Naruto stares at his phone contemplating weather or not he really really wants to answer it.

_What if it's an emergency…but I have caller id! It would give me a name or something wouldn't it?_

"Just answer it." Suddenly Naruto remembers something. He slowly turns around and stares at Kiba.

"What the fuck are you doing in my apartment." It was a statement not a question. "You, mutt face, are the last person I want to see." Angry blue eyes glare at Kiba then Naruto flips the phone open. Keeping eye contact all the while.

"What."

Silence.

"Naruto Uzumaki… This is Shikamaru Nara. You are to come to Uchiha industries immediately or we will come find you and-" Naruto hits the end button. Sigh…

_'This is why you don't answer the phone if you don't know who it is!'_

"Who was it?" Kiba reached for the blonds shoulder, but Naruto shirked his grasp.

"None of your damn business." The blond growls. His golden eyebrows were furrowed and a scowl present on his face. Naruto sighs then looks at Kiba tiredly "Look Kiba I'm not trying to deal with you right now kay."

Hurt crosses Inuzuka's features and the anger.

"Is this about the locker room?" the larger of the two steps towards the blond who just continued to gather all of his stuff together. Naruto really didn't care to be hauled off in public so he would just comply and go to…Uchiha industries… isn't that and upstanding…fuck it. He was too tired for this shit. He would politely or not so politely decline again and leave. That transfer was sounding pretty good right about now.

As Naruto was inserting his arm into his jacket he was yanked around harshly to face Kiba.

"Then when are you trying to deal with me huh? Look I was just having a moment. As my _best_ friend you should be able to understand that! Naruto. Naruto look at me! Where the hell could you possibly have to go this early in the morning? Where the hell could you possibly have to go that you can't tell me?"; whilst saying this, the volume of Kiba's voice continued to rise till he was just yelling in Naruto's face. He even shook him at the end.

Naruto winces.

"Say it don't spray it…sigh…Look Kiba I got to go can we talk about this later." The grip on the sun kissed boy's arm tightens further causing a pained moan to leave Naruto's plump lips.

"SSSSsss! _Kiba! _Let go of me we will talk about this later I promise!" Kiba pushes Naruto towards the door and stomps over to one of the blonds tan couches. He flops down and props his feet up angrily on the coffee table.

"We _will_ talk about this when you get back and I _am _staying here until you do." Naruto nods and quietly closes the door behind him.

Then he opens to door slightly and sticks his head in to say "So are you skipping classes cuz I was just gonna-" a shoe was thrown angrily and with precision in his direction. Needless to say the blond closed the door quickly and quietly before the flying projectile could be of any harm, behind himself while walking to his next destination.

**30 min's later…**

Naruto stood in front of a 15 story building…just stood there. He got pushed by passer byers and cursed for his stillness, but that didn't stop him from just standing there…like a retard.

A deep heavy sigh came from his lips when he walked towards one of the giant revolving doors.

_'I'm going to have gray hairs before I'm 20!'_

Naruto continued to just walk in a circle in the revolving doors until he built enough courage…a.k.a. until a fairly large man with a black suite and black shades on started walking in his direction.

This building was so damn _deceiving!_ His tennis shoes squeaked against the clean marble flooring and as he looked up he saw the lobby filled with buisnessy looking people. Just standing there and talking, waiting in front of elevators while tapping their foot impatiently and staring at their watch, or just loitering around looking at what had to be, 8 foot by 5 foot plasma screen TVs. This was just not his scene.

When he walked straight ahead he saw the pretty receptionists who looked like they were drowning in phone calls and kind of felt sorry for them.

"Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you but can I just take the stairs?" he got a solid nod from the girl with two identical buns on the top of her head. Naruto nodded his thanks and walked leisurely towards the stair well. Hell he wasn't in a hurry to get to the bastard and his lackeys. Oh no no no no no.

Kisame the giant practically used his sofa as a toilet! It stunk so badly when he farted… Gawd, Naruto thought his plants or he would die of noxious fumes! So since he couldn't find his matches he grabbed the vacuum. He had to admit though… the noise was funny.

He was so lost in his thoughts that he had reached his destination. The 15th floor. Since he was in football and had thighs like tree trunks and calves like steel, though not grossly so…no Naruto was pure lean muscle and sexy, he really didn't notice that he made it up so quickly and was thinking of walking back down and out. It really wasn't a bad idea. However as he took his first step down the stairs he was yanked backwards by a force so powerful he felt like a leaf in a gale.

Arms were under his knees and his back and his eyes were clenched so tightly that it actually hurt. He _knew _he was being held bridal style. He _knew _he was feeling very small and girly. _And _he _knew_ that whoever was holding him could possibly murder him if they felt like it. _However_, once again, he did not know _who_ was holding him in such a way, and _why _it felt so familiar and...

Brilliant blue eyes open to see Shikamaru.

Chocolate brown eyes glinted in a way that made Naruto whimper.

"Troublesome" Naruto opened his mouth to respond, only to embarrass himself by resembling a gaping fish for water. "Where were you planning on going?" it was a very simple question. But this very simple question would not receive an answer. No matter. Shikamaru began to walk a familiar path to the only office on this floor. His shiny leather shoes clacked on the wood floors as he walked past the redheaded receptionist that held about a million piercings in his face. He didn't even look up.

'_What a bad receptionist.' _Naruto noted. _'not to mention scary looking…I wonder if he got them all at the same time?' _Naruto scrunches his face at the thought of it and unconsciously bring Shikamaru's attention to the receptionist.

"Pein…what did Mr. Uchiha tell you about your piercings." The man actually looked up and looked to be a little older than Naruto…but that could have been due to the piercings in his face.

"It's not like he cares so why should I…I just get paid." The red head then looked back down at whatever he was doing.

As the door opened a smell sucker punches Naruto's nose and he almost gags. Scratch that he did gag, and when he sees the giant smiling black man with surprisingly nice hair with pointy teeth he points and practically screams. "YOU! You walking fart sack! You disgust me! Fix your diet or something! Gawd have mercy on our souls! You must have done something horrible in your past life! Ugh! You toxic bio-hazard to all forms of life, you should be ashamed!" the animated blond was practically trying to become one with Shikamaru in his attempt to get away from the smell. He was just so lively. A loud thud brings everyone's attention to the pale man at the desk whose head struck quite painfully with the wood desk he sat at. A very un-Uchiha move on his part.

"Oh gawd I think I'm going to be sick…ugh" Naruto's wide blue's then look up into Shikamaru's chocolate-y ones and he glares. "If you aren't going to be sick then all of you in here are sick if you are _immune_ to the stench that is this office.

Shikamaru began snorting in a poor attempt to cover his humor while still holding the blond. Naruto could even hear a deep laughter outside of the door.

Kisame looked pleased with himself and the person whose head hit the desk was still face first in the desk. After a few moments everyone is composed, the face of the person at the desk is no longer becoming best friends with the wood surface, and Naruto is still being held by Shikamaru.

"Uh… please put me down. I mean I know you're strong and all but holding a 185 pound blond to show off is not necessary, really, it's not and I will laugh when you can't move your arms for a while. That is a sincere promise from me to you." Their faces were so close... but no one seemed to notice… or did they. Shikamaru continues to stare into this crazy blonde's amazing deep cerulean eyes, who he is still holding, and just gets lost in thought.

Shikamaru has come to a decision…

He is very comfortable around the blond.

"I BROUGHT COFFEE! Ugh you will never believe when I tell you that the Coffee house was actually packed, not that it's not packed like every morning, but I mean sheesh talk about animals in the morning! Ha well I got everyone's coffee! I hope I got it right this time!" a very happy looking Haku walks into the room.

A coffee cup is set down in front of Sasuke's face and he just stares at it. "It's wrong…again…" Haku doesn't seem to care and just gives everyone else there coffee.

"And this one is for you Shik..a…maru… um. Why is Naruto here…in Shikamaru's arms!"

"You will come to work at 6:00AM to 7:00AM in the morning and then work from 7:30PM to 11PM starting today." Haku was clearly ignored which also resulted in huffing, glaring, and stomping into the Uchiha's lap.

"Um no, Shika please put me down." Shikamaru raised on thin eyebrow and looks at Naruto funny for a second. "I promise you can pick me back up when I'm done." The pineapple headed man rolls his eyes but thinks about it. Does he really want this blond yelling in his ear if he doesn't do as he is told?

Shikamaru then put Naruto down. _'Far too troublesome' _

The blond proceeds to wipe the nonexistent dust off of himself. He then juts his hip out and rubs his chin while looking like he is in deep concentration. He then proceeds to tell Mr. Uchiha exactly how he feels about his reque- no demand. "Hells to the mother trucking no. No…no…no…and what is the word I'm looking for? Hhmm Shika help me out here… I believe the word is …Oh I know!" He snaps his finger and his face lights up as if he is about to say "Eureka!" and looks dead at the man who has become such a nuisance in his life. "No. I will not be working for you and I will not be subjected to this kind of treatment I-"

"Shikamaru…" Sasuke commanded. Shikamaru lifted the blond again in the same position. Naruto looked over at the Uchiha and squinted…

"You know…as I actually get a chance to look at your hair…it looks like a ducks ass…" the blond tilts his head to the side cutely unbeknownst to him. "Was it like that yesterday?"

"Well you see Sasuke here has a personality disorder and whenever he-" a glass was now thrown at Kisame's head. The shattered fragments littered the floor. The blond was very confused and curious as to what the giant fart bag was going to say until he realized something.

"See and this is why your office is a mess! Who? Please for the love of all that is cleanly, please tell me who, out of all of you lazy bums, sorry Shika I know the truth hurts sometimes, is going to clean that up!"

"See Sasu-baby I told you he was a girl." The blond sends a sharp glare to the androgynous boy but says nothing back.

"Hn, your job is to do what I say whenever I say. Now go to school Uzumaki, don't want to be late to English now do we dobe…"

_'Dobe…DOBE!'_

"If I am a dobe then you are a Royal pain in my ass… yep that is what you are bastard." Naruto received one death glare that bounced off of him, one dementedly amused look-curtsy of Kisame- , and one intense look that made him shuffle closer to the door.

"Ha! And talk about stalkers! You know my schedule without even looking you, you, you stalker!" And with that Naruto angrily spun on his heal and left the room.

"Wow! Goldilocks totally just dismissed you Mr. Not-So-Bad-Ass… I like him." And with a chuckle that just continued to piss the Uchiha off to levels un-discernable to man, Uchiha Sasuke did something very un-Uchiha like. He let his head fall gracefully (which hardly seems possible), and quite roughly into the deep Mahogany desk.

**End of Naruto's college classes and into football practice yay! .…well it's about to start anyway…**

"Just fucking kill me now!" Naruto was banging his head continuously on the lockers…it is 4:30 and we find Naruto just bashing his head away…well at least there isn't any blood…yet.

"Why so glum dickless?" Naruto sighs in exasperation then shrieks and jumps back when a hand was groping for his balls.

"Duh fuck man! Gawd! I thought you said I was dickless!" a fake creepy smiling Sai just smiles creepily…the jerk.

"Just wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt dickless, but since you didn't let me confirm my suspicions I will just have to mark you as dickless." Sai then walks away but says something before he goes to the showers.

"Don't hit your head so hard idiot." Naruto smiled a fleeting smile but he just couldn't do this. He was by no means dealing with…whoever the fuck Uchiha enterprises happened to be dealing with. He has classes to study for. Oh and not to mention a LIFE that he quite enjoys living.

**THUD**

And yet another reason he was hitting his head was to prepare his head for this… maybe he should have just run full out into the lockers like I mean sprinted to try and make a body imprint or cause himself to have a concussion, because this sure as hell felt like he was doing/getting both.

"Oooh fuck, Kiibaa…SSSsss…are you happy now duch?" warm breath cascades down poor Naruto's sensitive little ear.

"Depends, best friend, do you have time for me now? Huh!" Kiba reinforces the "Huh" by trying to make Naruto's body one with the locker.

"Well dependsssss oh fuck this hurts bitch! Do you normally fucking, ouch, shove best friends into lockers?" a not so happy chuckle escapes Kiba's mouth and Naruto is about ready to throw in the towel. This chuckle that Kiba emitted was a sign that Kiba was ready to blow up. Last time Kiba blew up the kid who hurt Naruto had 3 broken ribs and a broken leg. Now all that aggression was aimed at him and Naruto was really not trying to take that on.

"Talk and talk fast Naruto. Or this is not going to be pretty by any means."

"Damn it Inuzuka! Can't this fuckingggg oh gawd let up Kiba! Can't this fucking wait till after practice you got what? 15 min to get dressedddd mmm damn this does NOT feel good dog boy!" Naruto continued to struggle against the locker until the weight was suddenly…gone.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here? An abusive prince? We can't have that now can we…right princess." The voice was pissed, but not just pissed…worried.

**15 min earlier**

**THUD**

**THUD**

**THUD**

**THUD**

**THUD **Zabuza couldn't help but wonder…had the blond finally snapped. Zabuza always wondered what made the little ray of sunshine a.k.a princess so lively, optimistic, and fun.

He stood to the side of the entry way in the locker room and well just stood there. He contemplated if he should go in or not when suddenly there was a shriek from the blond. It was Sai, but in Sai's own creepy was he was doing what Zabuza would have done…check up on the blond…not feel up on the blond…though he could do that too. He grinned his toothy evilish grin, but it quickly fell when a brown and red blur zoomed passed him and slammed princess very harshly into the locker. At first it seemed to be fun but at the blonde's whimpers Zabuza concluded this was in fact NOT fun. So he intervened.

**Back to the present**

"Inuzuka you should learn to control yourself better. I don't care what Naruto did he asked you to let up, no?" Kiba was currently being held up by his meaty arms…which was saying something. Zabuza was no joke.

"Momochi, this does not concern you. So just back off and let me go." Unbeknownst to most of them all the players were geared up and just watching.

"Naruto, go head out I will speak with Kiba." Naruto turned watery blues to Zabuza and shook his head with a small smile.

He looked around and immediately pulled himself together this was his team and no one wants a weak leader.

"Everyone head out the _three_ of us will be out momentarily." His voice was stern and everyone respected that even though they saw the Sophomore's moment of weakness none really had anything to say about it. It was one slip up. Well one person had something to say about it.

"I think everyone in the room has the right to stay in here _Captain_ I mean really are you a man or a woman? You cry, you whine, you joke around _way_ too much, and you're just a Sophomore. What could you possibly have going on that Seniority, Juniority, and the rest of the team shouldn't know about?"

Naruto was livid. Who the _fuck _was Kabuto to question him so openly in front of the team. And the easily swayed ones actually started nodding their heads in _agreement _with the slimy son of a bitch.

"Juniority isn't even a word _dumbass_ and it's none of your damn business! No offence guys and offence Kabuto. Go fuck yourself and go practice!

Some miscellaneous voice piped up and Naruto just about lost it. "Kabuto is right." The super weak voice said.

"And what exactly is he right about?" Naruto looked at the crowd of football players. The ones in front glared at the ones in the back.

"The fact that you are a pussy and act like a woman!" another voice said and a few murmurs of agreement went around.

"Yeah that's why we call you princess!" in a move so fast no one even saw Naruto was up in the speakers face nose to nose.

"Tell me how you really feel." Naruto is a good 5 foot 11 so he can look down on people… Kiba, Zabuza, and half the fucking team just happen to be 6 foot 5. Shikamaru too.

"I-I-um…" Naruto decked him in the face.

"Do I hit like a girl. Do I look like a girl…don't fucking answer that. I have a dick contrary to Sai's belief and you can suck it if you need proof. You got so caught up in the moment dawgin on people even though you're hiding in the back that when confronted face to face you can't even figure out what to say. Now you little man are a pansy. Everyone else get the fuck out before I get coach. I'll take the rep as to why you guys are late but if you want that thing by the name of Kabuto as your captain or you want a different captain then go talk to the coaches and make your wants known… am I understood…" It was eerily silent.

"I SAID am I UNDERSTOOD!" yes sir rang out quickly and clearly in the locker room and it cleared out just as quickly.

As soon as the last person filled out Naruto slumped against the lookers and banged his head back into them.

"I think I'm gonna transfer out of this school…" and then Naruto found himself decked in the face.

The side of Naruto's face collided harshly with the lockers. He didn't whine, he didn't do much of anything. He said ouch of course and tentatively touched it before looking into two very livid men's faces though. No angry faces were found, no scrunched up anything, just two men with two very straight faces. This was probably worse than them actually making any face.

"Wanna say that one more time?" one of the two men inquired. Sigh. Today just wasn't Naruto's day.

"What if I said it's not you it's me? Would that work?" Kiba scoffed and some of the edge in both men's faces was taken off, but the hurt and anger still lingered.

"Try again princess." Naruto then gave up and broke down. With a shaky sigh he told them the reason for his words, told them how he didn't want to have to make the choice he was going to make, told them how the situation isn't anything like he would have liked it to be, and most importantly he told them about his new job. He told them everything and time just seemed to slip by.

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**Review! Please anything!**

**Lol let me know if you like it! If you like it i continue!**

**Also I try to get my updates out at soon as possible. There will be maybe a time spand of a week in between each post but i will get it out...if im not dead O.o...**

**Review! :D **

**Ja'ne!**


	5. Instincts

Disclaimer I do not own Naruto! If I did it would be a lot steamyer!

**No beta lol, if you wanna be my beta tell me please! You get to read the newest chapter before anyone else!**

**I think that's a good piece of bait!**

**Any who this is inspired by Totally Captivated**

**I'm starting to get off track and I know it's kinda slow but it will get there! Just you wait it's a comin'**

**lol Enjoy this is my idea of a good time! First fanfiction ever!**

**So be merciful you beasts!**

**P.S. My mini laptop got run over by a car so i finally got a new computer :) I'm so totally not dead yet!**

**Now read you mean readers of mine who favorite but never review you jerks lol**

...

**Go read the story already gosh! D:**

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After spilling his guts out to his friends in a most unmanly manner, Naruto attended practice like it was any other day. His body glistened with sweat like everybody else, his golden hair plastered itself to his forehead like everybody else, he was sore and pleased with how well practice went like…most, and he pumped out just as much effort at practice, if not more than everybody else. He pushed as hard as he could just like every day to show he was a capable leader as per-usual, and most of all he kept focus. Or maybe most of all he took a shower like everybody else.

He blocked out all the shittasticness that was his life, and for just a brief moment, felt like he was going to go home, take a nap, and then get ready to go to work… oh how wondiferously wrong he was…

A slammed locker door revealed a fresh and clean Naruto towel drying his hair. His black and orange Nike backpack was secure on his back, his all black Nike basketball shorts rested comfortably on his trim waist, the black and white Jordan's on his feet were comfortable and snug, and his orange tank top was snug on his lean upper body. Overall he was ready to walk out the giant steel door that was, what, 5 feet away from him?

But something wasn't right…

He could sense…

A disturbance in the force…

Naruto felt eyes on him. Like 3 sets of eyes to be exact. And those eyes gave him the chills to be quite frank.

Before we go on there is something you need to know about Naruto... Naruto is purely driven by instinct, and instinct told him to turn around so he knew what he was going to be running from.

So he turned around.

Imagine this, you are in a large dull yewllow room with three, ten feet tall black lockers evenly spread in this dull yellow room. One of these large black lockers is smack dab centered in front of you and just 5 feet away. Now on the side of you is open space, technically it has black benches in the space, but it's still proportional. Then picture the other two large lockers lining the walls on either side. You picturing this? Good. Moving on, now you see one person on the left in that open space, which technically is not open space due to the benches, between the big black locker in front of you and the one to the left of you. Then, against your better judgment, you look to your right and you see two people in that open space, which technically is not open space due to the benches, between the large black locker in front of you and the one to the right of you. Are you tracking? Good because this is the greatest part…

You ready?

This is actually what Naruto is seeing!

Great right! I know!

Due to what Naruto is currently seeing his nerves are sent into flight or fight mode. Even though is was more like fright and flight mode…but I digress.

On the right side was two hulking defensive line players approaching him at a rapid pace with determined looks on their faces. On the left side was dear old Kakashi Hatake approaching at a semi-leisurely pace, with his left hand shoved in the front pocket of his khaki cargos. He was even smiling, or what Naruto could only guess was smiling due to the slight crinkle in the mouth portion of the mask covering Kakashi's face, and the fact that his eye was making a creepy U shape at the same time. When he finally stopped about 5 feet from Naruto, his right hand extended towards him. It was holding up a… cell phone?

Naruto was quite puzzled and his face clearly expressed that, what with his eyebrows all furrowed and what have you. So he stared at the extended appendage in front of him quizzically. What was he going to do with Kakashi's cell phone?

"It's for you…" Kakashi said smoothly.

And now he had a clue.

Color completely drained out of Naruto's freshly steamed and cleaned tanned face, golden locks seemed to have lost a little bit of its life and luster, deep cerulean eyes dimmed just a tad, and the greatest feeling ever overcame Naruto. Maybe that statement is over exaggerated a bit. I think his feelings would be more accurately categorized instead if we say…

Naruto felt his death approaching him quickly and most rapidly.

So Naruto violently shook his head no and even seemed to flinch away from the phone.

Slowly and calmly Naruto took a slight, ity bitty, tensy weincy, step back...

Everything seemed to freeze.

Two hulking bodies froze as if in a game of red light green light, and two sets of intense brown eyes seemed to have dilated on him in intense focus, it was almost as if he was the big fat pig that was next to be hauled off to the slaughter houses.

A grey eye snapped open with scary quickness, and a calculating intensity took over like nothing Naruto had ever seen before. In fact Naruto didn't know that the lazy man was capable of showing such intensity_'…but then again he did go to the Super Bowl… wait how did he even know I moved aren't both of his eyes clos-…'_

Suddenly Naruto's shoulders stiffen…

_'What is he doing' _Naruto's deep blue eyes steel up, and while squinting in caution his own eyes dilate as well. He wasn't going to miss a single move any of these guy's made.

That would be like saying I give up.

Naruto wasn't going down without a fight...that just isn't how he rolled.

Slowly the phone was brought to Kakashi's ear. "He's going to have to call you back." And just as slowly brought away from Kakashi's ear only to be harshly snapped shut in between his fingers.

Then…

All hello kitty broke loose!

In one rather large stride, Naruto closed the gap between him and the door in less than 2 seconds. Naruto's hand yanked at the bronze door handle behind him as if to tear it off it's hinges, and he dashed out with speed that would make a running back jealous. His Nike backpack jangling with every large stride he made.

But Kakashi was not to be bested. He himself used to be a running back, so he took off after Naruto like a bat out of hell.

Kiba and Zabuza are defensive players that do pack speed but not on this level. That wasn't going to stop them from trying though.

Naruto was shoving people out of his way. No seriously like he was _shoving _people out of his way.

However Kakashi easily weaved through the cursing crowd.

Kiba and Zabuza however were too busy apologizing for nearly putting these poor people out of their misery with their size and strength, while all the while trying to keep up with the Speedy Gonzalez twins that were farther up ahead.

But Kiba and Zabuza's chase was for not. They just couldn't keep up.

Not to worry Kiba and Zabuza would get Naruto later because...

Naruto and Kakashi were gone in a frenzy of yells and curses.

So with a reluctant sigh Kiba took a rather large intake of air and yelled at the top of his lungs.

"**I know where you sleep at night!**" a very scary yell sounded off from behind, it kind of made Naruto want to turn around due to that instinct thing again, but was too far gone in his own adrenaline rush to really foucus on it. Only the pounding of his heart and.. a few of the indignant cries from the people being shoved out of his way, reached his ears.

* * *

Well I'm going to end this very short chase and get to the next scene :)

* * *

"Fuck you, Fuck you and Fuck you again!" a not so happy Naruto yells oh so very loudly while thrashing uncontrollably in rage, causing golden blond locks to flail in every which way and direction.

"Time and place Naruto. Name the time and place." a very nonchalant Kakashi says oh so very happily. With a tap of his heel the wooden double doors that Kakashi had entered through, closed.

"He is as lively as ever." Shikamaru said in a drawl. But he seemed to be scowling, because some body, that was not him, was holding a feisty blond over their shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

**SMACK**

And for a brief moment there was silence.

"D-d-did you just smack my **_ass!_**" a very stunned Uzumaki said.

**SMACK**

"Hmm I'm not sure you tell me..." then one more moment of brief silence was given.

Then the explosion!

"You fucker!" feet flailed in a miserable attempt to get Kakashi in the face. It wasn't exactly working however, why? Because one arm was securely wrapped around Naruto's waist, hence successfully pining the torso down, while the other acted as a strap to Naruto's thighs, which stopped any and all successful attempts to kick Kakashi in the face. So when Naruto finally realized this attack mode wasn't working he then switched tactics and began to knock Kakashi in the back of the head with his elbow...hard.

"Naruto," a very sweet sounding Kakashi said. And to any innocent bystander it was a completely legit and pleasant sounding voice.

"What is it backstabbing coach of mine?" Naruto replied back in a just as sugary sweet voice. Not once stopping his attack on the back of the silver headed man's...head.

"If you don't stop hitting me in the back of the head you will not play on Saturday and Kabuto will take your place." It was such a sweet sentence that the impact of the words hit Naruto in a very large delay.

Naruto scrambled on Kakashi's shoulder and pressed his palms into the mid section of Kakashi's back to allow himself to sit up just a bit, and looked over his shoulder to stare at Kakashi's silver head with wide cerulean eyes.

"GASP! You wouldn't! Would you?" Naruto waited with baited breath for the man's answer. This was some serious shizzit right now! At least to Naruto it was.

"Oh I would. Now, if I set you down you don't run. Do we understand?" a very _deceivingly _pleased sounding Kakashi said.

"Yes mother dearest!" a very angry blond hissed. However it wasn't a very _angry_ hiss pare se because his palms slipped off Kakashi's broad back and he face planted into that very back. So his very angry hiss became a very intimidating muffled angry hiss.

"Good! I'm so glad we had this talk." In a not so gentle motion Kakashi grabbed hold of Naruto's hips and none-too-gently set him on his feet.

Shikamaru was quick to steady the blond on his feet and Naruto could have sworn he caught a glare on Shika's normally stoic face.

"Why must you cause so much commotion in my office..." came an exasperated groan from a rather highly annoyed Sasuke.

"Well maybe…just maybe… I'm going out on a limb here when I say this… maybe you wouldn't have such _commotion_ in your _office_, witch is actually a disgusting hell _hole_, if and only if, you would stop dragging me here! I mean _really_ I am a man damnit and men don't get forcefully _dragged_ anywhere they don't want to go! And further more I-" Naruto's rant was abruptly cut off by a rather unappealing moaning noise.

"Oh _Sasuke_! Gawd YESS! Touch me _there!_" Time seemed to stop in the office.

...

Oh hell who am I kidding Naruto busted out laughing.

"Pfft Haku...what kind of a noise is _that_! Whooh! That sounds like that time you ate that really, really, _really bad, _ho ho I mean **_bad_** burrito at my apartment, and you were totally killing my toilet! Talk about bringing down the house! Geez I think the whole apartment building shook from your wrath!" Naruto doubled over in laughter and endless mirth seemed to fill the blond and it lit up his features like the fourth of July. It radiated off of him and leaked into the rest of the room touching all it's occupants, while embarrassing one.

This in turn made just about everyone laugh or snigger in someway.

Pissed and angry Haku shoved himself violently off Sasuke's lap and stormed out of the office in an angry huff, but not without giving Naruto's shoulder a harsh bump.

Before Haku could walk away Naruto grabbed his upper arm harshly. Halting all movement on Haku's part.

"_Why don't you moan for him the way you moaned for me baby? Does he not touch you like how _I_ touched you? I _know_ you can do better than that..." _and with that whispered seductively into Haku's ear Naruto discreetly pushed Haku away from him. Haku stumbled, but when he caught his bearings he whipped around, his long beautiful hair making a circle around him, and he slapped Naruto harshly across his face. Then stormed out of the room with a scream.

"Was it something I said?" a rather unaffected Naruto said while grinning a shit eating grin.

"Everyone but Naruto...out...now..." any left over humor died in that instant and five men left Sasuke's office. Each one threw Naruto a sympathetic look, while Naruto pleaded with his eyes for them not to leave him alone with the spawn of satan. Well, all but one. Kisame just ginned and gave Naruto's hair a good ruffle.

After all had cleared out, Naruto stood all alone, in a nasty office, in front of a nasty man, with a nasty attitude, and in an _extremely **nasty**_ office.

Naruto's face crumpled into something akin to pain as the true smell of the office greeted his senses. Without everybody in the room to distract his senses it was even more dis-

"WHY WON'T YOU THROW AWAY THAT _damned _**_PIZZA_** BOX!" Naruto couldn't take it anymore! With quick steps he seized the pizza box! It put up a good fight, and almost bit him, but he wrangled it in. Yeah straight into a trash can. He tied up the bag and when the creature seemed to try to rip it self out of the bag Naruto quickly cried out for the Uchiha to give him a bag or something.

Unbeknownst to them they were working together very well. When the pizza box escaped by tearing its way through the bag, because Sasuke wasn't fast enough or just didn't believe him, they chased it and cornered it...together like second nature. And when the thing tried to crawl away from Naruto when Naruto had gripped the back of the pizza box, Sasuke grabbed Naruto's hips and pulled him into his broad chest. They really did work well together.

Well that was until they finished reining in the pizza box.

After Sasuke stabbed the pizza box untill it stopped squealing he stood up and dusted his pants off. Naruto smiled a genuine smile at him and looked into his eyes as he was about to say thank you...but the words just seemed to die in his throat as he stared into onyx eyes.

They stared intensely into each other's eyes and got lost for a moment. Naruto couldn't put his finger on it but he could have sworn on everything that something just clicked in his brain.

Then, just as quickly as their eyes met Sasuke's eyes turned cold and he shoved Naruto to the floor and walked to the office's double doors. Sasuke had a harsh and tight grip on the handle, and with out looking back he hissed,

"I want this whole office spotless by the time I get back." then he slammed one of the oak doors on his way out.

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**Lol this is very short! :D What if I just stopped here?**

**Are you angry! :D**

**Good Now go read something else you impatient beasts!**

**I wouldn't do that to you guys you silly gooses because you waited so long!**

**Enough as is so on with the story! :D **

**Unless I shouldn't post it... **

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**...JK . XD**

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"Stupid son of a bitch..." Naruto hissed.

Naruto was pissed.

Point blank.

No he had transcended to a level that was _beyond_ pissed!

"Who the fuck does that son of a bitch think he is!" Naruto hissed more quietly after tossing the dirty paper towel in his hand into the nearest trash bin behind him. He backed away from the newly cleaned and streak free window, that was surprisingly dark, and turned to survey his handy work.

Naruto, wasn't pissed anymore.

He was proud.

It's amazing to Naruto to find out just how large the office really is. Now that all the trash, boxes, and all manner of various _stuff _is gone, it actually did look like a very big and important business office. Not to mention it now actually looks like it can seat 8 other potential bodies into it.

Where did all the trash go? One may ask themselves. Well here is the answer, Naruto struck a deal with some of the lovely janitors and their lovely janitor trashcan wheel around things, and they made frequent visits to this office for the first time in their lives to haul out trash.

The janitors sympathized with him and understand what it's like to tackle a huge mess all alone. So with all the shit out of the way the room now looks immaculate.

Yes, Naruto was quite proud of himself.

It had been abut 5 hours and it was actually the first time he looked around at the newly cleaned and spacious room. As he did he caught sight of a clock on the wall he hadn't realized he had cleaned, a very strange and ugly wall clock it was but a wall clock non the less, and looked what time it was.

And that ladies and gentlemen is when he freaked.

It was 12:50 AM and he had to be home... like an hour and 50 minutes ago.

He then looked back at the overly large dark window and cursed all the curses known to him. Enough so that a sailor would take notes.

_'That's why the damn window was so damn dark!'_

He isn't a road scholar just yet. Cut him some slack.

In his haste to leave he didn't take the sensible and perfectly use able elevator... no he bolted down the stairs...15 flights of stairs...

I told you he wasn't a road scholar just yet.

As he reached the ground floor he bolted out the door to the stairs and skidded to a magnificent halt in front of 3 men in black. Shikamaru, Kisame, and ...

"You're that fucker who pulled a gun on me!" Naruto yelled rather rudely while pointing an accusing finger at Neji's face. The pale eyed man sneered at Naruto and Naruto's cerulean eyes narrowed dangerously in turn. While the two men's glare fest continued Kisame threw a hefty arm around Naruto's shoulders and squished him to his large side.

Naruto's stance faltered, but his glare never left Neji's face.

"Ehum!" Shikamaru cleared his throat rather unnecessarily and reached a long strong arm over to yank Naruto from under Kisame and to break his glare with Neji.

He then calmly proceeded to lead Naruto out of the building.

When the warm night air hit Naruto in the face he relaxed and even...leaned onto Shikamaru. Weird.

In front of him was a large black limousine with such dark tinted windows it had to be illegal.

Shikamaru reached out to open the door for him when he stopped midway.

"Naruto... you know if you really want to you can... sigh... did you clean the office?" Naruto stared puzzled at the taller man and just kinda stared.

"You know Shika, you kinda give a guy the impression that you care? Be careful hahaha! Don't wanna give me the wrong idea right?" Naruto smiled brightly at him but it slipped in an instant and he wrenched his self away from Shikamaru and away from the car door.

"Thanks for the sympathy, but no thanks!" Naruto hissed as he broke out into run.

If it was any other day he would just be walking with a purpose on the nearly empty sidewalks, however he knew that if he did that he would get caught. Instantly.

Realizing that they knew his address Naruto slung his Nike back pack in front of him and rifled through it to find his cell phone. Not once did he stop his speed. Turning in some back ally's that he thought only he and the other _normal_ citizens knew about he bolted for Kiba's house.

Finally finding his cell phone he quickly hit number 3 on his speed dial list.

"Pick up you bastard...pant...come on...breath...come on!" the phone continued to ring until a tiny click was heard.

"_What do you want asshole!_" Kiba hissed into the receiver.

"Halaluya! pant...Kiba I'm headed your way... if your in my house take the emergency exit out and get home...pant...now! Bye.." and he clicked the end button. He threw the phone in some pouch, zipped it closed, and slung it back over his back.

He knew he cut Kiba off, but he would explain as _soon_ as he was cleared of this mess.

Now that the phone call was over his hearing came back to him and he noticed something...

The rapid pounding of footsteps.

"SHIT!" Naruto screamed at the top of his lungs. The dirty brick walls and various trash cans now becoming even clearer to him. He saw his last chance to lose these guys as a very hearty laugh came from behind him.

"You can run my pretty, but you can't hide!" the sick giant black fucker yelled.

It was really dark outside...but Naruto could still see the hole in the fence that would just barely fit him. There was no way in hell Shika could fit through it, and hell would freeze over before Kisame could...but Naruto forgot about someone.

He crawled through the fence just as the tip of his shoe was caught.

He yanked his leg roughly and the grip was gone and he was back up and running.

Naruto began to laugh maniacally as he ran, he was home free...that was untill he was tackled like 10 feet away.

His face hit the ground harshly and something else clicked in his head...or against his head...maybe both. A gun was pressed to the back of his head, but as hinted before in the maniacal laughter, Naruto at this point was insane. No sleep, no break, no dinner, and most of all... no ramen... all day... At breakfast today he decided to you know like eat _healthy_, because seriously a guy can't live off of ramen you know. It's just not healthy. So he promised himself he would eat it for lunch only to get reined into eating a _healthy_ lunch by his friends. He consented only because he thought that he would eat some when he got home...He was wrong...again...So now he just didn't give a shit about life at the moment! What was fucking life without fucking **_RAMEN_** DAMMIT!

Naruto easily gave a glare that would have made a dead persons heart beat and then stop again. However the thing that made it scary was the sick and twisted smile on his face...if that can be considered a smile...his eyes seemed to have also gained a violet tint to them...but that could have just been the night.

Naruto's instincts kicked in again...however this time, it was fight mode.

He flipped Neji over while _still_ laughing like a maniac, so that Neji's face was in the ground, and he pulled Neji's arm behind his back. He then twisted Neji wrist to point of crying out. If he had twisted any further Neji was sure his wrist would have been broken. Naruto then quickly grabbed the gun when Neji's grip was weak, and pointed it next to Neji's head and began firing all the bullets out of it and into the dirt ground that was of course, next Neji's head...still laughing.

Once five shots fired out and Neji was shaking Naruto leaned down carefully and whispered in his ear...

"Do you feel lucky punk?" He said grinning a shit eating grin from ear to pretty little ear.

"well do ya?" he started laughing again slowly then it exploded into maniacal laughter again as his hands wrapped around Neji's throat...

"I tried to play nice... really I did" Naruto whispered in a sad voice.

"But you just kept _fucking _with me... do you want me to fuck with you Neji? Is that what you want!" He yelled at the end and squeezed tighter around Neji's throat.

"Because I'll fuck with ya' haha, oh yes I'll fuck with ya' in more was then _one..._" Naruto emphasized his point by licking the shell of Neji's ear slowly and nipping it oh so very lightly.

Neji shuddered. Whether in delight or fright was unknown.

"Do you want this to all end and go away?" Naruto asked sympathetically. He loosened his grip by just a bit and listened to the ragged breathing and occasional cough. Dirt was probably flying into the poor man's mouth.

"Or maybe... I shouldn't make it all go away after all now you know how I feel!" He growled at the end. He tightened his hands again and Neji wheezed.

"So what's your answer?" Naruto asked curiously.

Neji wanted to say are you schizophrenic, but thought wisely _'if he is schizo then he will probably strangle me to death...'_

"G-g make it..._wheez_...make it..._cough_...make it go away..." Neji wanted to die at that moment from the sound of his own pathetic voice...just not at the hands of the golden blond.

"Good boy...hand over your wallet..." Naruto squeezed in pulsating movements as he waited. Giving air then taking it away...giving air then taking it away...

By the time Naruto released him and Neji was in the fetal position Naruto had a nice little wad of cash to get some ramen...yum.

He vaguely heard Neji saying a broken sentence about how their wasn't enough money for him to leave the country, but Naruto didn't need money to leave the country...why would he leave the country...silly goose...he needed money for ramen...lots and lots of ramen to make up for his shitastic life... yep yep yep...

**... ... ... ... ... ... ... .. . .. ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...**

"And that is how the day went..." Naruto leaned back into Kiba's chest while sitting in his lap eating ramen across from a T.V.

Kiba wrapped his arms around Naruto's waist and rested his head on top of Naruto's. He sighed for the millionth time and actually for once was at a loss for words with his princess.

"So do you see why I wanted to transfer?" Naruto asked with a quietness that was strange coming from him. His head tilted back as he tried to look into Kiba's eyes. Kiba didn't reply back right away, but as he was about to give his answer his arms tightened around Naruto's waist.

"No...no I don't... it's not good enough of a reason." Kiba was just being stubborn at this point. That's the only way he could possibly be saying no to Naruto at this point.

Naruto sighed heavily and tried to get up only to be denied the privilege.

"Kiba if you're not going to listen then I am out of here ok! I'm trying to not get all fucking emotional, I mean come on dude! Don't you see! I must have done something fucked up in my past life. There is no way I can function with this schedule! It's to much and not enough time I..." Naruto shoved off of Kiba harshly.

"Fuck you Inuzuka. Give me my key." Naruto glared at Kiba with hurt and angry dark blue eyes and thrusted his hand out in front of Kiba's face ready to just take his key and leave, but faltered when he saw the angry look on Kiba's face.

"Are you breaking up with me?" Kiba sneered meaning for it to be as hurtful as possible. Naruto knew he was being sarcastic...really he did...ish.

"We were never dating, you stole my key!" Naruto snapped furiously.

"Now give it back jack off!" Naruto yelled he was sure the other dorm residents could hear him, and honestly at this point he didn't give a damn. He then thrust his hand out again to emphasize his point. He just wanted to get the hell out of Kiba's room and figure out his next move.

What he was not expecting however was Kiba's answer.

"No..." Kiba snarled angrily as he pushed himself off the floor and took a small step towards Naruto. He then puffed him self up to look more intimidating, and looked down on the slightly smaller male. Pieces of Kiba's shaggy hair fell into his handsome face and accented his ferocious look. His strong jaw was tight and determined, his tattoo's made him look even more like a caged beast, and those eyes... those pissed, angry, furious, enraged, stupid, sad, caring, smoldering, sexy, fucking...loving eyes...

"Nooooo, Kiba you know we can't do this... We're hitting that line again..." Naruto groaned/breathed out as he looked upwards into Kiba's too emotional eyes.

Naruto didn't notice it, but his eyes lost a bit of their bite as time seemed to drag on.

"Naru..." Kiba breathed out quietly as he leaned his forehead just an inch from Naruto's.

Naruto didn't noticed it but he closed that inch, and allowed Kiba's forehead to rest on his. They stared with hooded eyes at one another.

"Kiba..."Naruto breathed shallowly.

Naruto's lips felt extremely dry.

So he licked them.

"We've been through this... we can't do this Kiba... we're too close ...I... I can't... we can't lose this..." Naruto finished with ragged breathing. The messy dorm room along with the no longer recognizable sounds coming from the T.V. all became white noise. Nothing else mattered at this crucial moment, but the boy's.

Naruto's lips were really, really, _really_ dry.

Slowly Naruto's hand reached up to touch Kiba's face then slide in that unruly hair...only to stop just an inch away.

Kiba's eyes shut in pain and his eyebrows furrowed as he whined like a kicked puppy from the lack of touch.

Kiba was going to forcefully bring their body's together by wrapping his thick arms around Naruto's waist and yanking him to his chest...but his arms stopped from wrapping around him. They were just inches away from closing around his waist... they just hung there in the air as if giving an air hug.

Now it was Naruto's turn to whine like an abandoned puppy and shut his eyes to fend off the invisible pain.

"Why can't it be _us..._" Kiba's voice had deepened somewhere along the line and shivers went up and down Naruto's spine. His words ghosted over Naruto's lips and Naruto almost gave in.

Naruto's hand that hung in the air dropped and both of his large palms made their way to Kiba's broad chest and he ran his hands up Kiba's chest, over his pectorals, up over his shoulders, and then back down to rest on Kiba's large sternum.

They stared at each other and knew...knew...and knew that if it had been different... if they had not been as close as they were now... if they would have met later rather than sooner... they would have been together and even closer than what they were now.

With lips just centimeters apart Naruto pushed away gently and went for the door.

No last objections about a key being given back...

No he just walked to the door with a pounding heart.

He closed it quietly and stood with his back to the door for a moment then walked down the dormitory hallway to the nearest elevators.

And before the elevator doors could a rather monstrous crash and a very anguished dammit resounded through the hallway.

By tomorrow everything would go back to normal and every thing would be alright.

By tomorrow Kiba will get his head back on straight.

And by tomorrow Naruto would be done crying...

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**Can I end it here?**

**Huh what was that...**

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**I can't?**

**Who are you to tell me what I can and can not do!**

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**..**

**Well if you say sooooooooo...**

**then keep reading you jack wagons!**

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"That's two black coffee's, one hot cocoa, one cappuccino, and one coffee with extra, extra, extra cream and sugar you freak!" Naruto grinned as he handed Kisame his sugary caffeinated beverage.

Naruto brushed his palms on his pants as he had just finished handing out beverages to everyone except Haku, who was currently pouting in front of Sasuke, and waited with baited breath for the reaction.

No one knew he was because he looked very angry on the outside...but on the inside he wanted to know...

Just how great his drinks were...

Silence...

And then...

"Wow...oh my gawd...WOW... WAY TO GO GOLDILOCKS! HE ACTUALLY GOT IT RIGHT! AND IT'S GREAT!" a large slap was given to Naruto's back from Kisame to show his _appreciation_ for Naruto's beverage making skills, and Naruto retracted violently from the Kisame's large hand and glared at him venomously.

"If you never want coffee again...do that again..." Naruto said with a hiss. He was angry! He was functioning on what, 4 hours of sleep? To do what? Make fucking coffee for lazy hit manish jerks! Hmph! Naruto didn't even drink coffee himself! He just learned how to make it for...the...old man...

When Kisame just kept on laughing and walked away Naruto, Naruto turned angry eyes to a very relaxed Sasuke who was quietly sipping on his coffee.

"I don't know why you need two black coffee's when clearly I can brew you another one myself..." Naruto stated with all the incredulousness he could possibly shove into the words.

"Hn" was the intellectual's eloquent reply as he continued to indulge himself on his most definitely delicious coffee.

"Hn, he says...well fuck you too duck butt.." Naruto mumbled under his breath as he walked passed Sasuke's newly polished desk , thanks to _somebody_, that Sasuke propped his dirty shoes on and "accidentally" shoved those dirty feet of that newly polished desk.

A choke and a curse was his reward as Naruto walked towards the double doors.

The choke from Sasuke...the curse from Haku as some of the coffee spilled on him.

Naruto knew he would be the one to clean it up later, but for now it was worth it.

As Naruto passed Shikamaru, Shikamaru hummed in satisfaction as he sipped on his tasty hot cocoa. Naruto smiled happily to himself proud of his beverage making skills, until he caught angry pale eyes on him.

Then Naruto's smile turned into a sadistic grin.

Which in turn caused Neji to continue on quietly drinking his correctly made cappuccino while looking in every direction possible that didn't hold Naruto's blond figure.

Maybe Naruto could get used to this...

Nah.

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**NOW I AM FINISHED...**

**SERIOUSLY I'M DONE **

**YOU WILLNEVER EVER EVER GET SOMETHING THIS LONG AGAIN IN YOUR LIFE...**

**FROM ME AT LEAST...EVER AGAIN...**

**WHEN WE COME BACK **

**NARUTO WILL BE WORKING AND IF YOU REALLY WANT ME TO UPDATE FASTER...**

**SOMEBODY TELL ME WHAT DAY IT IS IN THE STORY...THE FOOT BALL GAME IS ON SATURDAY...BUT WHAT DAY AM I ON...I'M SO LOST...**

**AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULTS LOL**

**SO I SOMEBODY CAN TELL ME WHAT DAY I'M ON I WILL UPDATE FASTERERERERER!**

**YESSSSSSS**

**...**

**REVIEW YOU BARBARIANS!**

**JA'NE**

**THE PUMPKIN KING!**


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